MONTH OF APRIL 2010

APRIL 1
(Unclassified material. Use it as you please.)
"We regret the delay in answering you. It's very difficult to find time for letter writing in the midst of present global turmoil. Please do not expect much from us in way of correspondence. Besides, just recently, the Opposition managed to temporarily disrupt our internal mail system." Jan 1/1982

"Yes, the possibility itself and contingency plans have been considered to use S.U.F.O.R.T. as a future rescue/pick-up center. It seems you are not totally blocked in your memory recall." Jan 1/1982

APRIL 2
S.U.F.O.R.T. (Stratford U.F.O. Research Team) disbanded many years ago, and I have no idea what their contingency plans are now. (I bet you thought it was an April Fool's joke!) In the 1980's, Oscar told me about this Internal Mail System, and I sent quite a few questions through it. You will see the answers to some of them attached to various blog posts. I don't have the ability to send questions anymore - that ended when Oscar died.

APRIL 3
On June 13, 1987, a woman (L.H.) from Naples, Florida, who claimed to be a contactee/abductee, wrote a letter to me:

"I received an astral-like communication from contacts beyond the realm of my logical understanding. I was encouraged to visit Dr. S in Wyoming. They left five items (through automatic writing) for me to check in his files, naming drawers, numbers, etc. Item number three stated: there is a number forty-five to be written within drawer top ten, drawer with the key in its box.

"Dr. S and I found the drawer, which was above a drawer with a key in its box and, strangely enough, a few days before, Dr. P, his associate, had numbered this entire drawer full of files, for a research project. File number forty-five was with Dr. P.

"Dr. S has written me since that, upon checking Dr. P's file number forty-five for this drawer of his, it contained personality inventories and questionnaire comments from yourself. Dr. S states that your file letter comments on personality items of an inventory referred specifically to item number 45!

"Strange coincidence: having Dr. P. randomly number your file 45; have the file contents refer directly to item 45; and, prior to my ever knowing what was in Dr. S's file system, have an 'astral contact' state to check 45. I wonder where this path leads."

It led to April 1, 2010. L.H. and I briefly exchanged letters about this in 1987, but nothing really came out of it...until now (23 years later). I had a feeling that I was supposed to post two excerpts from my Internal Mail System answers as my blog entry for April 1. (I wasn't very comfortable about doing that, though.) I wanted to post my poem, A Prayer to the 'Gods' first, then I would decide what I was going to put on my daily blog for the day.

I searched the top drawer of my tallest filing cabinet (I have four cabinets - a total of ten drawers between them), looking for the poem. Instead,I found the letter from L.H. I read it again and inexplicably focused on the numbers: 45 (there is a number forty-five) 10 (within drawer top ten). Put into numerology terms: 4+5+1+0 = 10 Reduced to 1. What could it mean?

I found the poem and started typing it onto my blog. I finished three lines then had a strong urge to stop. I deleted it. Why? I felt the answer was in the numbers, so I wrote them like this:

4 - month? (April)
5 -
10 - year? (/10)
1 - day? (1)

I posted the Internal Mail System excerpts on April 1/10. Then I recalled "to be written" in the contact message. Was that my "item" to be carried out? What was 5? I counted the number of posts already on the blog and found that my April 1 one was number 5. Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not.

APRIL 4
When I'm 'on purpose' - going the right direction on my life's path - everything feels right about what I'm doing. Sometimes, though, I allow fear of the future to intrude and cause anxiety and hesitancy. I resisted posting the Internal Mail System excerpts (even though it felt right), and it took a letter from 1987 to convince me to finally do it. Once I did, I felt 'on purpose' again.

APRIL 5
The NOW fits into this somehow. I have to try again to stop my thoughts and experience the NOW. The more I want to play with it, the more convoluted my life becomes.

APRIL 6
I wake up with a strong conviction to experience the NOW. It's difficult to break the ties with the past and the future. I'm always thinking about what I have to do and what I have already done. The power to create exists only in the NOW. When you do something, it is being done in the present moment. It is in the mind where the disconnection occurs. I realize how often (even as I type this) I think of some thing or some time other than this moment.

APRIL 7
I wake up with a strong conviction to experience the NOW. What happened to my experiencing it yesterday? It dissolved into the demands of the day. I don't want that to happen today. I will make time to do it. (In those two sentences, I prove to myself that I live mentally in the past and the future.)

APRIL 8
I wake up with a strong conviction to experience the NOW. What happened to my experiencing it yesterday? It dissolved into the demands of the day. Why do I have such a resistance to mentally existing in the NOW? Am I afraid? The NOW is an existence without boundaries. I built a protective wall around myself, and I feel safe within it. I need to step out of my own self-reality to see reality. I need to disconnect to be able to connect. I need to unlearn to learn.

APRIL 9
I'm a thinker. I enjoy it! It's like having company 24 hours a day. I'm never lonely as long as I have my thoughts. To live in the NOW, I have to stop my thoughts. What will happen to me when I do that?

APRIL 10
I'm standing on the shore of Wildwood Lake (south of Stratford, Ontario), eating a candy bar. (UFO viewing and 'munchies' always go together with me.) I think back to the afternoon when I suddenly had the desire to drive out of town. I knew I had to leave at exactly 8:00 p.m. (I usually follow any inexplicable impulse in my quest to track the elusive UFO.)

I hear crackling of the underbrush as something moves in the forest behind me. I think of the coyote attacks on women over the past few weeks (one fatal), reported on the news, and wonder how much of the candy bar I should keep - just in case.

It's beautiful here: the still surface of the lake mirrors the surrounding pines in dusky splendor. I know that a saucer could be right in front of me but just 'out of phase' enough not to be visible. I'm in the right spot. This is a minor 'window' location. One resident of the area reported seeing a UFO sucking up water from the Duck Conservation Area in the past. (I'm sure a few ducks went with it.)

The Duck Conservation Area is in the opposite direction from where I'm looking right now. I consider going to the other viewing spot, but decide against it because it's deeper in the forest. I'm armed only with a flashlight and a half- eaten candy bar at the moment.

Is my timing off? (I've done that before.) I suspect that it is. I finish eating the candy bar and, without anything left to distract a hungry coyote or the wild dogs rumored to prowl in the area, I say goodbye to Wildwood tranquility and drive back to Stratford.

APRIL 11
I remember an incident that happened during one of my visits to Oscar at his apartment in Toronto. His phone rang as I was about to leave. Oscar made no attempt to pick it up, so I heard the message that was left by the caller on his answering machine. It sounded like a man. He was talking in a bizarre fashion, and I couldn't understand what he was saying. It seemed like a coded message. Oscar didn't offer any comment or explanation, and he didn't act surprised or confused by it. (Oscar had told me previously that he often received cryptic phone calls when it was time for another meeting with "the boys upstairs.") By chance, did I hear one of those calls?

APRIL 12
I've been receiving phone calls with no one answering when I say, "Hello." I normally hang up because I figure it's a business with an auto-dial feature, so I want to disconnect before a live operator comes on and tries to sell me their product.

The phone rings again today with the same result; but, this time, I feel I have to stay on the line and "listen closely" to see who has been calling me. A few hello's later, the dial tone sounds, without anyone cutting in to speak to me. After I hang up, my head feels really strange for awhile then clears.

APRIL 13
I love watching You Tube. I come across the most interesting things. Today, I watch a short feature on Telekinesis. Here's the steps I need to do to move an object with my mind:

1. Relax and clear my mind (that's my first hurdle!)
2. Visualize what I'm going to do to my target object.
3. Energetically connect myself to the object (Everything is connected anyway, so all I have to do is mentally acknowledge and believe in that connection.)
4. Take slow, deep breaths and mentally observe the object being moved by me. (I have to let my energy flow freely. The less I try, the easier it becomes.) Yoda says, "Do or do not. There is no try."

To make Telekinesis work, I must understand that I am ONE with everything. As my favorite Star Trek character would say, "Fascinating!"

APRIL 14
Are ONE and NOW connected? Help me out on this one, Spock! As a diversion, I go to a salon and get my hair cut. (Doesn't everyone when they don't want to think about something that boggles their mind?) Maybe it will clear my brain - less hair, less thoughts.

APRIL 15
I couldn't resist these 'Words of Wisdom' for today's blog entry. Thank you, Mother Teresa.

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.

Mother Teresa

APRIL 16
"Today is Friday." I have to keep telling myself that.

I am sitting at my computer when I experience a 'blip'. It is as if space-time 'hiccups'. I'm in the same space as I was before, but it doesn't feel like Friday anymore. Everything looks new and strange for a moment (like it does when you're away for a two-week vacation and return home) then it becomes mundane and familiar again.

I ponder the odd 'day disbelief' in my mind and this reasoning surfaces: "It can't be Friday. Too much time has passed." I keep thinking that it must be Sunday, Monday, or Tuesday. How bizarre!

APRIL 17
I find myself staring at the television or the computer monitor sometimes, as if in a trance. I don't realize what I'm doing until I suddenly shiver and 'break the spell'. I've read about how watching television causes a hypnotic trance state in the viewer, but I'm surprised at how deep I go. Was this the cause of the 'blip' I experienced yesterday? I consider it. No, I don't think so. It was different.

APRIL 18
I wake up feeling very strange. I sense that I'm 'out of sync' with my normal
life. I have to work today, so I force myself to get ready. Once I get to work, my perceptions improve enough that I can function efficiently. What's going on?

APRIL 19
I haven't any motivation today. I keep telling myself that I have to get 'this or that' done, but I don't do it. My head feels dull, and I'm listless. I have a negative attitude. What am I aware of, on a deeper level, that is influencing my thoughts, outlook, and actions?

APRIL 20
I'm wandering in circles in my apartment building's parking lot, mumbling about directions and intently searching the sky.

(Rewind a few minutes.) I arrive home from shopping and check my e-mail. Lots of messages! One is from a new Facebook friend, J. He's a pilot, and his plane is en route to Toronto today. He tells me to go outside at about 3:45, look North, and I should see his plane at 15,000 feet. Right after I read the time in his message, I look at the clock - 3:45!!

What are the chances of it being the EXACT time that is stated in his message? (I always look for strange coincidences like this. I have met people over the years, who have helped me in some way toward reaching my goals, through oddly synchronized time and place connections.) I jump up from my chair and run outside.

(Fast forward a few minutes.) I don't see his plane. I'm doing the 'Captain Jack Sparrow Dance' around the building, trying to be certain where North is and why the plane isn't there. Reluctantly, I give up and go inside. (I'm already the lady who tripped over a suitcase in her kitchen and slashed/bashed her head shortly after moving in, requiring a trip to the hospital for stitches.) I can only imagine what my neighbors are thinking now: "Drugs! I tell you! She's on drugs the way she was acting out there!"

APRIL 21
Today, I consider making a profile for myself on the e-Harmony online Dating website. I would definitely be their worst nightmare! It would be good for a laugh anyway. I tried it before. (I kept my profile, and it's around here somewhere.) When I find it, I'll post it. More to come...

APRIL 22
I bought chicken wings a few days ago. While I waited, I saw a contest entry box on the counter for a free 3-month membership to GOODLIFE. I don't normally enter every contest I see, but something urged me to do so because I would win. I just got a call from David at GOODLIFE, telling me that I am the second-place prize winner...a whole week of sweat and sore muscles awaits me! Oh, happy day!

APRIL 23
"Are you sure that I'm the second place winner?" I ask a 'bulked and ripped' employee at GOODLIFE. (I'm not acting the part of a lucky winner.) He looks confused, so I explain, "It's important to me that it was an actual win and not just a marketing ploy to get members." He assures me that it was a legitimate win. That's good enough for me. I join GOODLIFE, but I'll still get my free week first.

Coincidence plays a major role in my life, and this is just another example: I enter a contest being told I'll win, and I do. It's pointing in the direction that I have to go.

APRIL 24
I'm at GOODLIFE, and A. is orientating me on their machines. For a long time, I've had the feeling that I have to tone up and strengthen my body. "It's needed before..." keeps popping into my mind, but the sentence never completes itself. I'm not worried about that until I respond 'off-the-cuff' to one of A's comments with, "I need to be able to survive anything."

I wander around the spacious gym and find the machines that I want to use when I come back. Being a procrastinator, I contemplate, When is the best time to work out? (A good procrastinator would always say, "Later.") Eleven at night pops into my mind. All right! I silently agree, I'll do it then. I'm not sure why.

As I walk to my van, I pause and look up into the sky behind the GOODLIFE building. Again...I'm not sure why.

APRIL 25
Work in progress. I will get it written. Trust me. I think the subject of trust is perfect for this day's blog item.

APRIL 26
If you have read this far, I commend you for your courage and tenacity. Please suggest my blog to ALL your friends and ask them to suggest it to ALL their friends. I'm out to conquer the world, and I have to start somewhere.

APRIL 27
I'm standing on a treadmill, looking for the jack to plug my earphones in, so I can hear the program on the flat screen television on the wall in front of me. I can't find it! How can I write a 120-page screenplay and not be able to find a phone jack on a treadmill? I'm feeling like an idiot! I'm hoping that I don't look like one to the other women, working out nearby. It's hard to be professionally posed while fingering the control panel in a seductively probing manner. I give up and ask for help. The jack is far under the panel, so I forgive myself, plug in, and start the treadmill.

As I begin slow and build up to a quicker pace, my muscles wake up, send a "What bear are we trying to outrun?" message to my brain, then warm up. (It's from that old joke: If you and a friend are chased by a bear, you don't have to outrun the bear. You just have to outrun your friend.)

APRIL 28
I write a pitch for ODYSSEY today and send it to Jeffrey Weissman. He's an actor who has played roles in two of the Back to the Future movies. Jeffrey requested a "one sheet pitch" from me.

Here are the first three paragraphs:

How do you know I'm human? Are you certain that I was born on this planet? What would you say if I told you that, on any given day, as you travel through a major city anywhere on this world, there is a strong probability that you will pass someone who isn't human and who wasn't born on this planet? And, you would never even know it!

In 1975, a Canadian, an American, and a Russian found out, in an extraordinary way, the truth of this statement through an incredible odyssey. These three men were individually contacted by benign extraterrestrials, brought together in Tibet, and whisked away on the adventure of their lives.

Encountering many strange and bewildering sights and experiences within a higher dimensional universe, the men learn, through near-heart-stopping events, about the fury of the cosmos, the essence of God, the Opposition's terrifying and destructive effect on Earth, the host aliens' unfolding, protective plan, and themselves.

APRIL 29 - Work in progress. I will write something here (other than this) soon.

APRIL 30
Douglas Adams said, "I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by." I always remember that comical quote on April 30.